Congratulations, YOU HAVE FOUND A HIDDEN FILE. Go ahead and read if you like, but please keep in mind that I have hidden these for a reason. These are bad or controversial works that I am more ashamed of than my other work ... or in the words of Shakespeare
If we shadows have offended,
Think but this, and all is mended—
That you have but slumbered here
While these visions did appear.
And this weak and idle theme,
No more yielding but a dream,
Gentles, do not reprehend.
If you pardon, we will mend.

Disclaimer 1: Most of this is fanfic. That means I do not own any of it. I just borrow it to play with for a little while and let people see the pathetic results if they really want to.

Disclaimer 2: I'm not making any money from it. It's just for fun.

Disclaimer 3: What isn't borrowed is all made up. None of this is real or most likely at all realistic. Please don't trust any of the information in here. Most likely you know more about whatever I'm writing about than I do.

Disclaimer 4: Attitudes, views and opinions expressed by the characters or in the story are not necessarily those of the author. Even when writing Science Fiction or Fantasy I do not tend to attempt to create perfect/better worlds in which everybody gets a happy end ... or whatever is best for them. Please accept that some characters will have a bad ending or be unhappy.

Disclaimer 5: I intend no insult to anyone. If I offend anyone I'm very sorry. Please understand that it was an accident as I tend to be very clumsy in these things.

Disclaimer 6: If my characters' conversations seem odd or they appear to be talking past each other the latter might occasionally be intentional, but most likely it is an accident and I'm not aware that they are. It's just my bad communication skills.

Cubic Metres Are Besides The Point

Title: Cubic Metres Are Besides The Point
Fandom: Yami No Matsuei
Characters: Touda, Byakko (Suzaku and Tsuzuki mentioned)
Prompt: 068. Lightening.
Word Count: 614.
Rating: G
Summary: Byakko is finally doing his Math homework. Just somehow it doesn’t quite turn out the way Touda’s did.
Author's Notes: Same continuity as the entry for school. I originally started this one for shapes, then decided it was better suited to friends and wrote the next one for shapes. Then I added them to the rest and found I already had one for friends. So lightening, because this will end up lightening the load for both of them.

"Byakko?" Touda asked in what he hoped sounded more annoyed than hesitant. "What are you doing?"

Byakko glanced up from his hurried writing. "What does it look like? Math homework."

"If that's the same problem I had for homework, one of us had better start over," Touda commented. "And I had straight As on all our tests so far."

Byakko frowned at two pages worth of calculations. "Did I mess up some 1 x 1 thing again?"

"How would I know." Touda shrugged. "I didn't actually check the numbers."

"So how do you know it's wrong?"

"Well, my homework didn't take up over two pages for a start."

"Your handwriting's smaller."

"Not by that much." Touda waved a neat half-page of homework at the tiger. "And there you added square metres to length metres and got kilograms as a result?"

"That's just a spelling error. They're supposed to be kilometres."

"No they're not. They're the sum of length metres and square metres, which can't be added in the first place. What you mean are cubic metres and you get those by multiplying, not adding."

"You do?" Byakko gave him that innocent kitten look which always caused Touda to want to either laugh out loud or scratch the cat's ears. "Well, no problem, I can fix that."

"Maybe so, but it's useless. Didn't you read the question? It says: 'What is the radius ...' Hence you're looking for a result in metres. Cubic metres are completely besides the point. And by the way, where did you find a depth for this? It's a flat shape."

"Er ..."

"You might want to start a geometry problem with the sketch next time," Touda advised. "Then you can visualise what you're looking for."

"I don't know how to draw the thing." Byakko admitted. "I don't even know how many corners it's supposed to have. I just ... Now my calculator went on strike. It says the number's too large." He hit his head against the desk twice, then looked up at Touda. "Help?"

Touda looked at the mess in Byakko's exercise book. It looked rather hopeless.

"Buy me lunch?" he asked in return.

"What? Tsuzuki gave you lunch money."

"Yes, but Suzaku took it. I couldn't very well fry her I front of the whole school."

"Suzaku steals lunch money?"

"She thinks it's part of the role she plays." Touda shrugged. "At least that's what she told Tsuzuki last time."

"Alright, you can have half of my lunch, if you do my Math homework for me."

"Oh no, I said I'd help you, not do it for you. I'll tell you how it's done, but you have to do it."

"But that'll take much longer."

"But you'll learn something."

"Some friend you are." Byakko pouted.

Touda froze. Friend? No, Byakko couldn't have said friend. Byakko hated him. All the other shiki hated him for his crimes and Byakko ... Well, everybody loved Byakko.

Byakko was innocent and sweet and playful. Cute and furry. And he purred.

Touda on the other hand was dark and rude and threatening. He was scaly and cold blooded. And he hissed.

Not a good basis for any sort of friendship, was it?

"Touda? Hey Touda, are you okay? Did I say something stupid? I didn't mean to, honest. I was just teasing. I'm grateful for your help, really. You know I hate Math, but you're right. I have to learn this before Tsuzuki finds out just how bad I really am," Byakko almost pleaded. "I'd never live it down."

"What? Oh no, just thinking." Touda said hastily. "We'd better get started. Like I already said you always have to begin with the sketch."

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